|A little redbush and blogging at my desk. #friday|
It's been a month since I spent a long weekend tucked away in a cottage with some of my favourite women*. We've done this twice now and each time it's been revelatory. This time I was expecting less. I'd been searching for some great project or story to share with them, discuss, brainstorm and frankly, I had nothing. Blank page. And I was okay with that. It felt right. It wasn't to be my turn and I was more than happy to be there in a supporting role for someone who actually had something to say.
We chatted and laughed, walked and talked deep. We did a releasing ceremony and set wishes into flight. We discovered that the spare cushion under the sofa fitted the dining table perfectly and lo...I had a reiki table.
And that's where
Sas and I had, at several points, voiced a shared concern that, "It might all just be bullshit, this woowoo stuff". I blame our DNA. There's no time for all that nonsense when you're down t'pit or sweating your bones out in front of an iron furnace. Whatever the root of it, we were both deeply, unwillingly, in doubt or something like it. We both just wanted proof. Just once. Little bit? Still, I can't speak for Sas but I was willing to err on the side of belief and so I went on with the reiki.
And this is where it got real. This is where I got my proof. I'm not going to tell someone else's personal story but to quote this brilliant video, 'Omigod, I totally got a download.' It was information, knowledge that I did not have, that I could not imagine, that I was not imagining. It was INSANE for a start. But I just couldn't argue. It changed me. There on the spot.
And then the next day, it happened again, a little more gently but just as real. The person I was working on when it happened asked me to explain how it felt. What happened? Typically, I was rubbish at explaining.
At home I kept thinking about this and how to explain it. Even how to teach someone to be open to it and how to differentiate between the truth of now and memory and/or imagination. I got quite eloquent. Or so I thought.
Then Megg recommended a book to me: 'Finding your way in a wild, new world' by Martha Beck. I didn't know Martha's work but I liked the title so why not? Well. Blow me down if Martha hasn't been reading my journal (or would have done if I actually wrote one). I'm still reading her book with an open mouth and lots of, 'But wait...I just...that's what I...EXACTLY...I KNOW!!!' going on. I'm half pissed off that my amazingly original take is apparently far from that and half thrilled that I'm a walking, semi-talking example of what she describes. She nails it. No woowoo, no bullshit, just multisensory ((c) Gary Zukav) living that we can all tap into.
So that's where I am. Musing. Downloading. While life stays full and busy and incredibly stressful in a 'not starving in a refugee camp' way. And amid it all I found out what I want to do next. Some of you know already and I'm very excited about it but working at my own pace so I have no excuse to freeze under pressure. More on this soon.
Have a great weekend.
*Sas, Sus, Megg, Emma, Penny and Lisa